If you find this, I am already at the bottom. I was the coyote who kept the books. For twenty years, I moved them across the water—at night, in the fog, past the Border Patrol boats. I thought I was helping. But last month, I saw a boy drown. Right there, fifty yards from the shore. His name was Emilio. I pulled him out, but he was already gone. The man who paid me said to leave him. Said it was just business.
His name was Leo, and he knew the lake’s secrets.
Not a strike. A snag.
He flipped to the last notebook. The final entry was different. Not a list, but a letter.
He dragged it onto the exposed roots of the pecan tree. The zipper was corroded but still held. Inside, wrapped in a plastic garbage bag that had somehow kept most of the water out, were notebooks. Dozens of them. Moleskines, the black ones, their pages swollen but legible. Falcon Lake
Most tourists came for the trophy bass—the double-digit giants that lurked in the flooded brush. But Leo came for the quiet. And lately, the quiet had been speaking to him.
The fog rolled in off the water like a held breath finally released. For the first time in a week, the surface of Falcon Lake was flat as slate, the violent chop that had kept the bass boats docked now a memory. On the northern shore, near the submerged ruins of Old Zavala, a lone fisherman stood. If you find this, I am already at the bottom
I could not finish the next crossing. I took the boats. I took the records. And I came to the lake where my father taught me to fish, where nothing was ever divided by lines on a map. I tied stones to the bag and let it go. I will do the same to myself now. But the truth floats. It always floats.
He did not call the police. Not yet. First, he sat on the roots of the drowned tree, the notebooks stacked beside him like a tombstone, and he listened to the lake. Somewhere beneath him, a church bell from Old Zavala still stood upright in the murk, its clapper long rusted silent. I thought I was helping
But Leo swore, just for a moment, he heard it ring.
Leo closed the notebook. He looked at the water. It was calm again, holding its secrets close.